40 Plus MOMS

Raising children at 40

First Day Home

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Welcome home baby!

Simona's 3rd BDay-034

There’s no way to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one.

Jill Churchill

As I’m striving towards pulling together a sensible story and purpose to my blog, I’m getting to reminisce about my experience as a mom from the day my child was born. I’m thinking for a person who was 37 when my daughter was born, I should have been more confident, definitely more mature, than someone who’s a first time mom at 25.

Yet I remember many moments of self-doubt as I feverishly flipped through “What to Expect in the First Year” and spoke at length to close family and friends for advice.  I recall being at the mall with my infant daughter one weekday afternoon, incidentally bumping into quite a few moms, with one mom in particular, standing out from the pack.  I’m sure my hair wasn’t combed that day and I noticed this one young mom who couldn’t have been older than 21 with twins. She looked calm, at ease, and well rested with her infant twins. She was with a friend and each was carrying one twin with a front baby carrier.  She didn’t have a stroller, making her travels with public transit in the winter more comfortable..  

Is it a function of age, circumstance, support network, or of course, simply attitude?  I certainly did become more at ease with my second child, better navigating my options for a better support network.  My family lives out-of-town and my in-laws are elderly so we needed to accept having to seek support outside of our family.

As I continue to ponder the age variances in motherhood, I did find this interesting link that offers an unexpected perspective on having children after 40…

Photos: Liliana Polcari

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